I've
learned more and experienced more beauty this year than I can list.
Nevertheless, this is my attempt to break a few things down –
concepts, experiences, changes. Even now I'm sure there are things
I'm blind to because I'm still in the midst of it...different is what
hits us. But these are some things I've been trying to notice and
grasp from this year, and a few developing thoughts....
Ways we have connected with our
neighbors this year:
- Community dinners! And one-on-one family dinners.
- Soccer at the park!
- Supporting local businesses
- Music together
- Our Justice Project! (see previous posts)
- Lending a hand with projects, like spring cleaning
- Bubbles, chalk, frisbee, jump rope
- Baking them cookies
- They teach US how to cook
- Starting a community garden and sharing the harvest!
- Visiting local churches
- Going to garage sales (which happen to take place all the time in our neighborhood)
Community:
- Intentional. Starting and ending with unity through active commitment. Openness.
- Pseudo community = avoiding conflict. Community = conflict resolution
- Taking off our veils. Veils allow us to see but to not be seen, giving us a false sense of power and control. What we truly desire is to see AND to be seen.
Justice:
- Pursuing God's heart for the world
- Overcoming entitlement
- The command for right relationships – God & man, Man & man, Man & nature
- Loving the person right in front of you...and more
- “What love looks like in public” - Cornel West
Prayer:
Expressed
attitude of our dependency on God in all things.
“To pray is to descend with the mind into the heart, and there to stand before the face of the Lord, ever-present, all-seeing, within you.” (Theophan the Recluse)
“To pray is to descend with the mind into the heart, and there to stand before the face of the Lord, ever-present, all-seeing, within you.” (Theophan the Recluse)
Sustainability:
“What
would happen if I lived a slower-paced existence?” (Serve
God, Save the Planet)
- Helping to build and cultivate a community garden.
- Doing laundry by hand.
- Limited technology usage!
- Making art from trash/recycled materials.
- Using public transportation to get around the 4th-largest city in the country.
- Learning where our food and other products come from. Supporting local business and committing to purchasing only Fair Trade coffee and chocolate in the beginning steps of understanding our roles as consumers.
- Budgeting (Mission Year budget: $17.50/week/person for groceries, $70 stipend)
Reconciliation:
...Ask
me about this one if you're curious.
Spiritual Disciplines:
Have
you ever heard of the “Examen,” by Ignatius Loyola? If not, you
MUST check it out:
http://www.ignatianspirituality.com/ignatian-prayer/the-examen/
"The
unexamined life is not worth living" - Socrates
Poverty, an illustration:
On Sunday afternoons, we go to a local
park for Simple Feast, a ministry where we serve and share a meal
with the people at the park, play volleyball, and just hang out. One
day another church drove in to pass out Lunchables and, well, preach.
I can see how people think they're doing something good when they do
this. But multiple people have come up to us afterward and say, “I
appreciate what y'all do. You just come and hang out with us and get
to know us. You don't try to cram crap down our throats like they
do.” People assume they don't know Jesus. They assume homelessness
is purely the result of poor choices. But let's be real: I'm sure a
lot of those guys at the park know Jesus better than I do. At any
rate, I've learned more about Jesus from them than I have from
drive-by churches.
“Preach
the Gospel at all times. Use words if necessary.” (St. Francis of
Assisi)
A
few of my favorite memories:
-
One night three of us hung out at our neighbor's house. Maya, 10
years old, wanted to give us pedicures. We sang songs together in her
room, as one by one she washed our feet and painted our nails. My
feet are super ticklish, so I was laughing uncontrollably through the
whole experience, which made everyone else laugh too.
-
For my experience with Sergio, see a previous blog post.
-
Translating “Are You My Mother?” on the spot to a couple Hispanic
girls in the nursery. They asked me to read it again and again until
they had it memorized and were reading to ME in Spanish, pointing to
the words as if they were in Spanish.
Things I've been learning in Mission
Year....
How to affirm people well and
receive affirmation well. Compliments are based on actions and
superficial elements. Affirmation highlights the truth of someone's
character. Both are good, the latter has made the biggest impact on
me this year. We, like children, are desperate for affirmation, but
we are not quick to admit our desire for affirmation. I am learning
not only to share good thoughts as soon as they come to mind, but to
actively search for goodness and imago dei in my brothers and
sisters.
To flow. And
I thought college life had taught me to be spontaneous...HA! One of
my art professors used to tell me all the time: “Let the process
inform the work.” I have a whole new concept of what that means in
life, not just my artwork.
How to trust God with my future.
He will grow me wherever I am, and use me to grow others because that
is who He is.
To hope in people. The hardest
people to love this year were some of the most unexpected. This is
not about getting what I want; it's about serving others. I can let
go of my judgments and anxieties of others because it is God who does
the fixing. God said, “I'll deal with their hearts. You LOVE.”
To let go of controlling things to
be the way I wish them to be. This means letting other people
write the grocery list and do the dishes. We all have different
standards of what life together should look like...who knew?
Forming new habits, breaking old
ones. Habits of response.
Habits of staying updated. Habits of affirmation. Habits of
revisiting dreams and who I am.
Generosity.
Drawing close to those who are
suffering, not running away.
A healthy transparency that invites
people in, not revealing all at once.
Sensativity.
My faith
doesn't mean anything until it costs me something.
Things I'm
learning about myself:
I want to live in
community.
I am a
professional artist, and I want more art in my life.
I am valued,
beautiful, and wanted – not just for my talents, but for my heart.
I want to live
in a warm climate, with Spanish-speaking neighbors. That has been
such a GIFT this year!
I want more
silence, and a steady, deliberate rhythm to life.
God's dreams for my life have never been so much at the forefront of
my mind, and I am learning to embrace them without fear. I have
confidence that as long as I keep those dreams fresh in my mind and
commit myself to prayer, the Lord will be faithful to guide me to
where I ultimately hope to be. And in the mean time, I will unapologetically savor the journey.
I've
heard someone refer to Mission Year as the ultimate “you had to be
there” experience. And that's not a cop-out, but a challenge:
Wherever God places you, be there.
Upcoming
post: The latest news on my future! It only took me til the last day
of Mission Year to figure it out...
Grace and peace, friends
